The Sorcerer, along with Archie over his shoulder, had been viewing the recent adventures of the Prince, Percy, Red Riding Hood and the Frog using the crystal ball.
“He seems to have turned things around,” observed the Sorcerer. “They have stopped the Wolf, persuaded Goldilocks to go on the straight and narrow…business as usual it would seem.”
“Pah!” Archie was scornful. “That Wolf was unhinged and, as for Goldilocks, him defeating a little blonde woman is hardly that impressive!”
“Says the man who, when acting as stand-in for Prince Charming, was given the run around by Thumbelina?”
“Whatever,” Archie was dismissive. “If they’re going to see the Beast, I am sure he will be too much for them. He sounds like a monster!”
“The Beast?” spoke up the Minstrel from tuning his lute by the fireplace.
“Yes, the whole Realm is talking about him.”
“Oh I know all about him!” said the Minstrel. “On my travels. Oh yes, he’s a terrifying creature and as strong as an Ox.”
“Really?” Archie approached him to warm his hands against the fire. “He’s powerful is he?”
“Oh yes! Has the strength of ten.”
“Ten what?” asked the Sorcerer.
“What do you mean?”
“Well, if he had the strength of ten chickens or ten infant children or ten kittens…that wouldn’t mean much would it?”
“Ten men!” insisted the Minstrel. “Ten strong men!”
“What else do you know about him?” Archie inquired.
“They say he used to be a man…but then he was cursed and turned into a Beast. It wasn’t long before a baying mob hunted him down so that he retreated into the sewers.”
“I take it that there were more than ten men in the baying mob?” the Sorcerer looked up from his crystal ball. “Hence why he had to retreat?”
“Oh, there were hundreds!” explained the Minstrel. “All with pitchforks! He was safe in the sewers for many years until eventually finding his way to the castle of the Princess. Somehow he got into the dungeons and here we now are.”
“And so do you know what he’s really doing in the castle?” asked Archie.
“He has taken her and all her servants prisoner. They are submitted to his every whim and want!”
“So, just to check,” the Sorcerer half smiled. “There are less than ten servants in the castle?”
“See though,” Archie returned to where the Sorcerer was seated. “By the Minstrel’s description of him, the Prince won’t be able to stop the Beast. He will get torn apart!”
“I would agree, if I hadn’t heard this from the Minstrel who is to the truth what you are to common sense.”
Percy raced across the Realm carrying the Prince, Red Riding Hood and the Frog. They were in the middle of a thunderstorm so the rain was crashing down on them and there was a powerful wind that the horse had a battle to get through.
“You know sire,” panted Percy. “It’s as if these weather conditions were especially arranged because we are going to a big gothic castle containing a mysterious and potentially dangerous beast?”
“Yes Percy, although I was always led to believe that the castle is one big ball. The Princess loves to throw lavish parties whereby the servants dance and sing around.”
“I’d heard that too,” Percy concurred. “In fact, some say that there is magic at work in the castle with household objects like lamps, crockery and tea sets coming alive to sing and dance at night. Despite this business with the Beast, it always sounds like such a jolly place.”
“And it sounds like the drinks flow generously,” suggested Red Riding Hood.
“Anyway Percy!” said the Prince. “What other intel do we have about this strange case?”
“Well sire, there is a myriad of rumours and gossip. If you believe the more sensational talk, we should go in there, hunt him down and put him to the sword. There are some saying he has gone from living in the dungeon to getting control over the Princess and subjecting her to several warped sexual fetishes.”
“Really?” spoke up the Frog.
“Yes.”
“Ribbit!”
“What…” the Prince began before remembering. “Of course, you’re a frog. We should expect you to make sounds like that every so often!”
“Ribbit!”
“Yes, you’ve made your point…”
“What sexual fetishes?”
“Adult human ones…”
“Like what?” he asked enthusiastically.
“Tying the Princess down, tickling her with a feather duster, getting her to dress as a Nurse, something about a safe word, a hamster, roleplay…I’m not an expert…but there have been stories of this going on long into the night. One rumour is that the Beast insists on the servants joining in which they have done quite cheerfully and energetically. However, others tell tales of her being enchanted by this gentle and shy creature who is harmless.”
“Who exactly are these rumour mongers and gossipers?” sighed Red Riding Hood.
“Oh,” nodded Percy. “They’re from all over the place! Like there was one Pixie in the North East of the Realm that told me in an Inn on the way to rescue the Frog about the feather duster.”
“So a Pixie?” remonstrated Red Riding Hood. “With Pixies being mischievous by nature, who lives on the other side of the Realm, is to be trusted as someone in the know?”
“That’s all we have to go on,” explained the Prince. “We don’t just act on one bit of idle gossip though. If lots of people around the Realm start mentioning similar stories, we intervene.”
“Therefore,” remarked Red Riding Hood. “You never know what jeopardy you could be heading into?”
“That’s us!” cried Percy.
“So we are going to have to investigate this Beast to assess if he’s either a bully or merely harmless,” said the Prince. “Have you heard anything about why he is a Beast and in the dungeon?”
“The result of a curse I believe.”
“A curse! Of course. That always helps move a forward a plot that doesn’t make much sense or the plight of a character needs explaining away. Exposition is so over rated if you ask me.”
“There seem to be a lot of curses flying about the Realm,” said Red Riding Hood.
“Too right!” agreed the Frog. “There should be some support for those of us who used to be human but have been subjected to shape shifting curses! It’s life changing. You can imagine the trauma and mental torment of it all. That poor Beast sounds like he’s become an outcast just because he is the victim of some horrible curse or malignant spell. No, there should be support!”
“Support?” asked Red Riding Hood.
“Yeah! Like a focus group that puts together a support package to be in place once the victim is cursed. Somewhere safe to live, a support network and measures put in place to help them with their mental health, their finances and ensure they are not the victims of prejudice due to their new form.”
“Have you been a victim of prejudice for being a Frog?” asked Percy.
“Yes! Life long friends suddenly didn’t want to know me. Oh yes! It was as if they were embarrassed about me. First, they stopped inviting me on stag weekends, then they ceased contact altogether so that eventually I was persona non grata.”
“Oh dear, how awful.”
“It wasn’t just my friends who shunned me or gave me dirty looks. Family members, the opposite sex, my therapist, complete strangers walking past me in the street…”
“Are you sure that wasn’t the result of your terrible puns?”
“Hang on…actually come to think of it, that all happened before I was turned into a Frog…”
“You do surprise me.”
The storm became so violent that they resolved to shelter in the first Inn they encountered which happened a little while later. Percy and the Frog went to the barn while the Prince and Red Riding Hood enjoyed dinner and drinks inside.
“After what happened with that horsemeat being passed off as beef,” began a dubious looking Prince as they read the dinner menus. “I am apprehensive about what to choose.”
“The vegetarian option?”
“This is a rural Inn,” smiled the Prince. “I doubt they’d have that option on the menu…”
“Quinoa and diced pumpkin in a red wine jus,” Red Riding Hood indicated the option on the menu.
“Fancy! Okay then, we can’t go wrong with that!”
While eating the aforementioned meal, Red Riding Hood looked at the Prince with a suspicious expression.
“What?”
“I don’t think this is really quinoa,” she frowned as she ran her fork through it. “Despite it being the most expensive dish on the menu, I reckon this is definitely pearl barley. And the pumpkin is carrot. How do they get away with it?”
“No Realm Union. No food standards.”
As they lamented their meal, a man entered the room and immediately crashed into the table next to them thus causing a kerfuffle. The other diners were tended to by the Innkeeper who then sorted out the drunken man by finding him a table.
“The Beast! The Beast! He’s hideous! Hideous!” cried the drunk at the top of his voice. “I’ve seen him up close!”
The Prince and Red Riding Hood turned around to inspect the man. He was dishevelled with a wild look in his eyes. He was trembling, having been out in the bitterly cold and stormy weather only moments before. They arose to join him at his table.
“Are you telling the truth?” asked Red Riding Hood.
“Yes!” he wailed hoarsely. “I worked in the castle. It was fine until he turned up!”
“Just to clarify?” Red Riding Hood asked. “So you were a servant in the castle?”
“Yes, I was one of the footmen!”
“Good, then can I just confirm?” continued Red Riding Hood. “Are there any dancing tea pots in the castle?”
“What? Innkeeper, can I get a drink?” he looked at her in confusion. “What are you talking about?”
“There are no animated sugar bowls or talking candlesticks?”
“No, what’s wrong with you?”
“Not even a chatty candelabra?”
“No…”
“Tell us more about the Beast,” the Prince urged him.
“I’d heard rumours of a creature living in the shadows of the castle dungeon. A strange presence who had apparently risen up from the sewers. There was mention of a grisly growling down there plus there was the smell of excrement wafting up to the castle. Nobody dared go down there yet one night he came above ground to take food from the pantry. The Princess disturbed him! She didn’t see his face because he fled. But she was intrigued by the creature and began to fixate on him. She was impressed by his astonishing frame while fascinated by his elusiveness. She dreamt of encountering him again but dared not go down to the dungeon in case he might possibly be dangerous.”
“Probably for the best,” nodded the Prince.
“But then finally he did come above ground again, once more for food. She had laid in wait for him and blocked his way back down to the dungeon before holding a candle light up to see his face. She was fascinated to see a hairy Beast before her. One with an almighty mane, a feral creature with sharp teeth and whiskers. She was overwhelmed with a deep desire…”
“To do what?”
“Just a deep desire, I will leave it at that,” the man shivered. “That was when the trouble began.”
“What happened?” inquired Red Riding Hood.
“She insisted that he live above ground within the castle permanently. She befriended him and dressed him up in human clothes and a pair of boots. He remained mostly out of the sight of us servants but he resided in her private quarters. He had a huge appetite so the kitchen staff worked around the clock to feed him. He feasted on whole hog roasts and three roast chickens at a time. Fortunately, he was toilet trained. But that was one of the few civilised traits he displayed. Along with his appetite for meat were other beast-like tendencies. Carnal desires and feral instincts that would not be denied. It was a scandal. He would embark on all night rituals, loud and chaotic. Last night, I spied one of them. It was demonic. Depraved debauchery! Afterwards, I could stay in her service no more. Not with him at large.”
“Can he speak?”
“Yes, that’s the thing, to see him you’d expect no more than barking, growling or a blood curdling roar. But he does speak like the rest of us.”
“You seem almost traumatized,” said Red Riding Hood.
“I fled the castle at dawn,” he explained. “After witnessing the awful events of the night.”
They thanked the man before returning to their table.
“What do you think?” Red Riding Hood murmured to the Prince.
“I’m not sure,” the Prince winced. “I’ve never heard anything like it. Listening to that fellow, one would be inclined to believe the Beast is a dangerous monster.”
“We will soon discover what he is, either way,” Red Riding Hood said firmly.
The next morning they departed the Inn, sharing their conversation from the previous evening with Percy and the Frog.
“I don’t like the sound of this,” whined the Frog.
“What happened to all that stuff about supporting people like him and being empathetic? All those things about not being prejudicial?”
“That’s all very well and good until said creature tears your head off with his bare paws! No, I think we should take a hard line against the hairy freak! Kill him on sight!”
“Charming,” said Percy.
“Yes?” asked the Prince.
“No, not you sire.”
“We need to go tooled up,” continued the Frog. “What have we currently got? The Prince has, what? A sword and shield along with a dagger. Red Riding Hood has her crossbow. That won’t be enough! We must stop off somewhere to acquire another crossbow, poison, an ice pick, an axe, a musket, a hammer and maybe a spear or a harpoon.”
“He’s one person, not an army!” cried the Prince.
“And I’m not being weighed down with all that!” added Percy.
“I don’t know why you are so paranoid Frog,” said the Prince. “It’s not like you will be involved in any action. It’ll be myself and Red Riding Hood putting ourselves at risk of being torn apart by the Beast.”
“I know that, but if he kills you two, who will take me to the Sorcerer to be turned back to human form?”
“I really wouldn’t get your hopes up about that,” remarked Percy.
“You don’t think it’ll be possible?” the Frog was anxious.
“Not if you’re getting the Sorcerer to do it.”
A moment later they passed through a ravine below some hills before coming out the other side to see a castle on the horizon. It was a splendid and enormous building although built more for grandeur and entertaining presumably as there was no moat or fortifications.
“Do you know this Princess?” Red Riding Hood asked the Prince.
“A little,” he nodded. “She is the youngest daughter of the King of this region. She was given this castle as a gift for no ruling responsibilities or duties came with it.”
“Duties?”
“Yes like opening flower shows, presenting sports trophies or riding around the Realm rescuing damsels in distress or stopping evil Trolls and perverted Wolves.”
“Oh, so she was allowed her private life?”
“Yes, I believe she was deemed too frivolous and whimsical to be trusted. Instead those Royal obligations were divided between her two older sisters. She’s mainly been a recluse since.”
“She sounds worryingly similar to the Princess who desired me,” shivered the Frog. “Why are Royals always so eccentric or depraved?”
“Excuse me?” the Prince asked.
“I guess it’s the inter breeding?”
“Excuse me?”
“Oh come on! I was a Prince and during my adolescence it was always assumed I would end up marrying some cousin or other!”
“That’s never been my experience,” the Prince protested. “I take offence at being lumped in the eccentric and depraved category.”
“You’re riding around the Realm on a talking horse with me in tow so you’re hardly sound of mind!”
“Have you ever considered being a motivational speaker or a life coach?”
They reached the castle doors where a servant greeted them. However, they were unusually not granted immediate access. The servant rather sheepishly went inside to discuss their arrival. As a consequence, they were kept waiting for ten minutes before the servant returned.
“My lady welcomes you,” he informed them. “Although your famous talking horse cannot come inside. I understand that would not normally be the etiquette for him due to his fine breeding, however the Princess fears he might disrupt the harmony of the household. He may go to the stable.”
Percy along with the Frog were accompanied by a second servant to the stable around the side of the castle.
“That’s a blow,” the Prince sighed.
“Goodbye and good luck sire,” Percy sighed tiresomely.
They went into the castle where they were greeted by a line of servants who led them to a huge drawing room at the back of the castle. Night was drawing in so that they lit several candles around the place.
“I wonder if the candles will start dancing and singing now?” said Red Riding Hood.
“Or if a teapot will be talkative?” the Prince chuckled.
A table was brought into the drawing room to be placed in the centre. This was rapidly lined with a buffet of fruit, cheeses, cold meats and a spit roasted wild boar. Bottles of Wine, Sherry, Port and Brandy appeared alongside this feast as they were each invited to repose on a chaise lounge by a roaring fire.
“This is luxury,” marvelled Red Riding Hood. “I’ve never seen anything like it.”
“She certainly enjoys opulence beyond my experience,” agreed the Prince as he was offered several slices of wild boar by a servant. “No chance of horse or donkey meat here.”
They were fed to bursting point for the best part of an hour until dessert came in the shape of trifles, fruit flans and a long chocolate roulade.
“Excuse me,” Red Riding Hood asked a servant pouring her a glass of Port. “But will our generous host be joining us?”
“She will be down soon,” he explained. “Although her time is precious so you will forgive her for being brief.”
Red Riding Hood waited for the servant to withdraw before giving the Prince a puzzled expression.
“She’s preoccupied with something or someone then,” he whispered. “So the stories hold water.”
They were on the brandy, coffee and after dinner mints when the Princess finally made her appearance in the drawing room. She was a petite figure with reddish hair and a warm look in her eyes. She greeted them attentively to sit down in an armchair facing the fireplace.
“I am honoured to have you here Prince,” she waved a white lace gloved hand in the air. “Although I am a little puzzled as to why. My understanding was that you perform chivalrous and heroic deeds when required.”
“When ever there is suffering, I am there,” nodded the Prince.
“Yes, I appreciate that, yet there is no suffering or peril here in my home. Not unless my chef undercooked the wild boar!”
“He certainly didn’t,” smiled Red Riding Hood. “There was enough left to feed hundreds. I hope it won’t go to waste.”
“No it won’t, somebody will take care of it,” she replied confidently before knitting her eyebrows. “Nonetheless, I don’t know why you are here? Is there some problem nearby that I am unaware of?”
“Not so much nearby,” the Prince cleared his throat. “More of a problem here in your outstanding castle.”
“Oh, not the drains again?”
“No, although there might be a problem within your sewers…”
“The subsidence?” she rolled her eyes. “I knew building a castle near the hills would be risky!”
“No,” the Prince sighed impatiently. “There are rumours all around the Realm that you are being victimized by a mighty Beast. An overwhelming bully who has intimidated you to the extent that you choose not to even so much as leave the castle. Apparently he has the power of speech along with a mysterious past. Word is, that he has essentially taken you hostage in your own castle.”
He searched her face for any recognition or tell-tale signs like fear or denial or shame.
“Oh him!” she beamed.
“Yes, him,” the Prince gave her a quick nod. “You know who I mean, don’t you? You can talk to us about him, don’t be shy.”
“Yes, he is my dear friend,” she smiled with pleasure at the thought of the Beast. “But I am no victim of his nor he mine. He has changed my life Prince. I was, I guess, lonely here in the castle with just the servants for company. But then he emerged from the shadows and, without sounding corny, made me see the light.”
“That was corny,” remarked Red Riding Hood.
“So are you saying there’s no problem?” checked the Prince.
“Not at all,” she was adamant. “I know our relationship might not be conventional and that some people might find it unusual or challenging but for us, it’s so natural.”
“So he isn’t bullying you?”
“Him? Bully me! Of course not!”
“And he doesn’t intimidate you?” asked Red Riding Hood.
“No! People can be so judgemental and small minded. That’s why they’ve jumped to all the wrong conclusions. They should keep an open mind and leave us to live our lives and be happy. Not spread falsehoods and essentially scandalize us!”
“Okay, I suppose,” the Prince blushed. “I am sorry. You understand that we felt compelled to check you were safe?”
“I know and I appreciate that Prince,” she remained cheerful. “If only people wouldn’t judge others on their appearances. There’s me, a small young female and him a big Beast. Therefore people assume I am weak and vulnerable and that he is bound to be some ferocious bully. Never judge a book by the cover.”
“I suppose so,” conceded the Prince.
“Now please will you excuse me,” she arose. “I must go and see him.”
She left the two of them alone in the drawing room.
“Classic,” said Red Riding Hood. “She’s completely brainwashed by him.”
“What?”
“I am not fooled by that little act. Pretending they’re in love and that all is fine so that we go away none the wiser. She’s obviously petrified!”
“She didn’t seem petrified?”
“No, what we need to do here,” began Red Riding Hood. “Is somehow reassure her that she can talk freely. Maybe drop in a codeword or something to let us know she is indeed a hostage of the Beast so we can strike. It’s crucial that we make her know that she will be safe if she shops him.”
“I’m not sure,” the Prince finished his Brandy. “I admit that all is not what it seems here but she did not strike me as being in distress. No, I say we do some snooping tonight. Let’s see what is really going on between them.”
The servants ushered the Prince and Red Riding Hood to bed soon after which they did, going to their separate rooms in the North tower of the castle. Gradually the servants drifted to bed so that the castle went quiet. The Prince departed his room to go knocking quietly on Red Riding Hood’s door. It opened immediately.
“You knocking on a woman’s bedroom door in the middle of the night?” she grinned. “I am honoured.”
They ascended the spiral staircase from the tower to the third floor of the castle.
“The servants did ensure we were as remote as possible, didn’t they?” said the Prince.
“Far as possible from the dungeon?” suggested Red Riding Hood.
The two of them eventually reached the ground floor, being careful not to make more sound than necessary. They then spent a few minutes wandering from room to room before they found a door down to what seemed like the dungeon. It was locked.
“This must be it!” hissed the Prince. “But if we break it down, we’ll wake the servants!”
“Not to worry,” Red Riding Hood reached up to her left ear to pluck out the dainty silver ear ring she wore.
Seconds later, the door was open and she replaced the ear ring. They wandered down another spiral stairwell which was in darkness. Somewhere in the distance came a grunting sound.
“Oh no,” the Prince reached for his sword.
They kept going until they found themselves in a long corridor that was lit up with flaming torches fixed to the walls.
The groans and grunts increased in volume. Now they could also hear a slapping noise.
“I used to like my job,” whispered the Prince. “What terrible deed are we about to witness. That poor woman!”
“There’s no going back now,” hissed Red Riding Hood.
They edged hesitantly down the corridor to the end where the peculiar and harrowing sounds were coming from.
“Whatever happens next,” said Red Riding Hood. “We fight together. No regrets.”
“No regrets.”
The disconcerting mixture of moaning and slapping troubled their ears as they turned the corner into the dungeon.
What they saw next was disturbing nay depraved. This correspondent will attempt to protect the sensibilities of the reader by keeping the details to a minimum, so dire was what the Prince and Red Riding Hood had to witness.
In summary, the dungeon comprised of one central cell in which the Princess and the Beast were. One of them was secured face forwards in a set of stocks. They had a black leather mask on their face. Meanwhile, the other individual was walking up and down on their bare back in their high heels. After a little of this, the latter stepped away prior to producing a whip which was lashed against the back of the other.
“Tell me you like it!” demanded the Princess.
“I like it…” came the voice of the figure in the stocks.
“I like it mistress!” she hit him harder.
“I like it mistress!” he said as the whip thwacked his bare buttocks.
“What’s the safe word?”
“I’ve forgotten it mistress…”
Another thwack of the whip echoed about the place.
“Forgotten it or don’t want to say it?”
“Typical,” the Prince sighed. “I should have known better.”
“These people are perverts,” remarked Red Riding Hood.
“They sure are.”
As the Princess attached a strap on device to her mid-riff, the Prince and Red Riding Hood departed the dungeon in a state of shock.
“So sire?” Percy asked the next morning as they rode away from the castle. “That seemed to be resolved without any harm or bloodshed?”
“I’m not sure about that,” said Red Riding Hood. “The Beast’s back and bum will be a right mess this morning.”
“Yes, Percy,” the Prince assured him. “All was well. Just never ever ask me what happened last night.”
“It’s okay sire, I will ask Red Riding Hood instead.”
“I am going to a hypnotist,” said Red Riding Hood. “To have the memory blocked out forever.”
“We must never speak of this,” vowed the Prince.
“Agreed.”
“Sire, can you spill the beans when it’s just you and I alone?”
“No Percy, I am concerned I might develop PTSD…”
To be continued…
Athon 